Firstly, it would be really handy if I could add pictures to this blog. My “add media” function just ain’t working these days, which bites.

Tonight was a bit of a crapshoot. My upstairs neighbour’s mother came by my apartment today to let me know that he (the neighbour) is fighting for his life in the hospital. He was rushed to Pittsburgh a few days ago, as his kidneys have completely shut down. She asked my help in clearing out his apartment of all the garbage and dirty laundry (including sheets and such). Though I’m quite ill today, I agreed to help, feeling really bad, as it’s pretty clear they don’t think he’s going to make it.  Anyway, AFTER I’d handled all his half eaten food and dirty bedding, she mentioned that the reason he was dying was due to having contracted MRSA!! Yes, the DEADLY superbug!

Gah!  So I ran inside to wash myself down with as much disinfectant as possible. She couldn’t have told me that part BEFORE I came into contact with infected materials, could she?!

Anyway, I also went shopping today, finally getting some food. It’s good not to worry about starvation anymore. :D  I had a lovely dinner of fried chicken and stuffing. Mmm. Finger lickin’ good.

In my sickly state, I also had a time out in front of the telly where I partook of the movie Ratatouille. It was alright. I like clever animated films, so it was fun to watch. But I missed a lot of it as my sister wouldn’t stop calling me. Ah well. That’s what family’s for, eh!?

Tomorrow I’m going to my parents in the morning for my regular Sunday visit. Not staying long, though, as I have to be back in time to watch The X-Factor with Ross! Hehe. It’s our tradition for him to get his webcam out and point it at the TV so we can watch the program together, even though we are five hours apart. Simple things, eh?

I am completely wasted right now. Am sleepy. Was up until after 2 last night and then got up at 8 this morning. It made the day seem SOOOOO long, which was kind of nice. I mean, it was getting dark when I went to get groceries, which means it was about 5 o’clock… and now it’s not even 11, yet it feels like SOOO long ago!

Is it really stupid of me that I bought myself a tiny carton of egg nog? I mean… yes I am allergic to it and suffer for days after drinking it… but… it’s egg nog! It tastes so good!

Alright. I’d better go and continue vegging out. I am working on a self portrait at the morning, which could be interesting. Lol. We’ll see how it goes.

Good night, Moon.

Tomorrow marks the three year anniversary since pro-wrestling lost one of its all time greatest performers.  Eddie Guerrero had a lot of personal demons that he fought in his life, and no one could say that he was perfect. But in the ring, he was as close as I’ve ever seen.

After he died, the WWE had more than one tribute in his honor. One that sticks out in my mind was a video set to 3 Doors Down’s Here Without You. It is a beautiful song, which ironically I haven’t heard in quite a while, but which I heard again today on a CD that my husband made for me.

The song has always broken my heart because it reminded me of Eddie and the great talent we lost. But listening to it again today, I cried for a different reason. Being separated by thousands of miles of ocean can make for desperate unhappiness. I’m so far away, and I’m so confused as to what I want in my life, let alone in my marriage.

For now, here’s the best I can manage:

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby
But you’re still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you’re still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me

The miles just keep rollin’
As the people leave their way to say hello
I’ve heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I’m here without you baby
But you’re still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you’re still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it’s all said and done
It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I’m here without you baby
But you’re still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you’re still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me

I’ve been wanting for ages to get a new blog design, but I can’t afford anything really good right now. So I’ve entered a giveaway over at So Chic Design. If you want to try your luck, go on over!

I want nothing more than to curl up in my bedroom now and sleep away the whole night. But as I’ve made the promise to update every day for a month, I feel it is my obligation to do so.

So, to sum up my day, I looked and felt good today, I am slightly worried about politics at work, I went to see my parents and they fed me pot roast which was good, and I miss waking up with someone beside me.

To bed I go before I become saturated in my own depression.

Creativity, thy name is Millennium Gypsy.

So even though my Nano word count hasn’t gone up at all, I’ve at least not been idle. Today I have been painting! I’ve done two watercolor boards which are both absolutely adorable! In fact, I’ve tried a completely new, more cartoonish style, which to my mind looks phenomenal. :)

I’m very proud.

Tomorrow, I’m meant to go visit my parents, but I think I may skip that and work on my writing to try and get my word count up. I’m about 10000 words behind schedule! D’oh!

Right now I’m about to fall asleep at the keyboard, and I’ve got a terrible migraine, so I’m going to go veg out in front of the tv for a bit and hope to feel better soon!

Soooo sick.

I think I must have eaten too much dinner or too many chocolates or drank too much Dr Pepper tonight because I’ve spent the last two hours sick to my stomach, with no signs of it dissipating.

This is the first time this has happened in about two months, and it is horrendous. I’ve basically digested enough that there’s no chance of throwing up, but it’s not enough to have passed through my system completely, and I am now feeling like sticking a vaccuum through my belly button to suction out my innards!!

Let this serve as a reminder to myself NEVER to overindulge. It so is not worth the effects.

*sad*

Does anyone have any ideas for what I can do to get a good night’s sleep?? I’ve tried going to bed early, staying up late one night and gettingup early the next to be extra tired, warm milk/hot chocolate/tea before bed, sleeping pills, benadryl, soothing music, etc…

But I have huge bags under my eyes, and I haven’t had a good night sleep in weeks. I have a job interview tomorrow and another on Thursday, and I’m seriously not at my best.

The house is clean, everything is in order, and I feel quite secure here. But I just can’t sleeeeeeeeeeep!

I’ve washed my bedding today and remade the bed, so maybe that’ll help. All I know is that if I don’t get some rest soon, I’m going to cry.

Suggestions very welcome.

One worries whether one should be worried when one is awoken by three burly men with hammers who are beating on the side of one’s home… Then again, one would be certainly less worried if one could get up the courage to simply ask said burly men why they are attempting to remove her windows from their frames.

Is this some new service provided by the landlord? If so, consider me not a fan when such services begin at 6:30 in the morning and continue on, even now it is 8:30.

Also, such debauchery really makes one feel that nuding up for a shower would be quite the stupid thing to do when there is the possibility of randy burly men suddenly appearing with shards of glass…

*this post has been brought to you by the paranoia fairy - alive and kicking since the winter of 1986 when another burly man (one dressed as Santa Claus) attempted entry into the second floor bedroom of my four year old self, only to be met by screams and kicks to the shin.*

I have SO much to write about. I don’t have time at the moment, but suffice it to say that due to a LOT of good luck this week, I am now installed in my new abode, happy and thriving and looking forward to the future.

I will expand on this all this evening. For now, I’m off to buy a lamp.

Just a quick update to say that I arrived safely into the busom of my family this past Wednesday. My total travel time was 21 hours, 25 minutes. WHOA!  I was up for over 24 hours straight, not being able to sleep on the plane.

On the plus side, I watched three films onboard. The TERRIBLE What Happens in Vegas, the decent Kung Fu Panda, and the AWESOME Ironman.

The last couple of days have seen me buy a car, seek an apartment and look for a job, all while bonding with my family.

My biggest impressions of America after being away for so long are:

* WOW stuff is expensive
* WOW finding an apartment is hard
* WOW I have so little knowledge of how the world works, it’s criminal!
* OH MY GOD, I MISS MY HUSBAND MORE THAN I EVER THOUGHT POSSIBLE

Will update more later.

Starting time: 10:44 PM
Name: Kathleen Rebekkah Vyktoriah (Katie)
Sisters: Amanda Elayne (Manda)
Brothers: Joshua David (JD) and Padraic John (Pat)
Shoe size: 7 or 8 (UK) 10 or 11 (US)
Height: 5′8

Where do you live: Wokingham, Berkshire, England
Favorite drinks: Water. I can’t drink fizzy drinks or alcohol.
Favorite breakfast: Pancakes with sausage patties all drenched in maple syrup. Or biscuits and gravy. Mmm.
Have you ever been on a plane?: Haha. I used to be a Flight Attendant, so planes were kind of a prerequisite. :)
Swam in the ocean: Amazingly, no! I have paddled in the ocean severally, but I have never had the pleasure of actually swimming.
Fallen asleep at school: I used to miss entire afternoons worth of classes by falling asleep in the school TV station.
Broken someone’s heart: I very much doubt it.
Fell off your chair: Quite a few times. Including once in 8th grade while wearing a miniskirt and very tight corset top. The fecking hottie of our class pushed it out from under me and laughed.
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: Yes, but only because there was a family emergency I was waiting to hear about.
Saved e-mails: I always save emails.

What is your room like: I have a small office in the house which holds a computer desk, several three drawer cabinets, SHELVES UPON SHELVES of books, a load of cubbies, a guitar, loads of candles, incense and aromatherapy oils, and all of my art supplies.
What’s right beside you: My computer tower to my left (which is covered with stacks of unfinished paintings) and a bunch of paint brushes, paintings and cameras to my right.
What is the last thing you ate: Chicken Korma. About three mouthfuls, which is all I can stomach these days.
Ever had chicken pox: Yep. Don’t remember them, but I have a nice little pockmark scar on my forehead.
Sore throat: Erm… hasn’t everyone? I’ve had strep throat and tonsilitis more times than I can count.
Stitches: Only from surgeries. Never from injuries. I have over 400 stitches/staples in my stomach. HA!
Broken nose: Twice. First time because my little brother swung a two by four at my face when I was 11. Second time because a cabbage patch kid fell off the top bunk bed and onto my still recovering face.

Do you believe in love at first sight: It’s happened to me once. It didn’t last.
Like picnics: I don’t really think I’ve ever truly been on one.
Who was/were the last person/people you danced with: My cat Gypsy. Right before she stuck her claw in my face.
Last person who made you smile: Ross. He’s useless with his tool…. by that I mean the screwdriver…
You last yelled at: The cats. They are completely nuts.

Today did you:

Talk to someone you like: I talked to Ross and the cats. So I suppose so! I also talked to Sara, the lovely nurse at the endocrinology clinic who vampirically assaulted me with needles.
Kiss anyone: Ross and the cats. I’m an affectionate bugger.
Get sick: Hehe. I threw up water on the living room rug. Woops!
Talk to an ex: Nope. It’s not that time of year. ;)
Miss someone: Certainly. I have a lot of someones I miss since I live in a foreign country!
Eat: I did! And it stayed down and didn’t hurt! Thank god for lanzoprazole!

Best feeling in the world: When I hold my cat in my arms and she falls asleep purring adorably at me.
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: I sleep with my hubby and a teddy bear called Not Quite.
What’s under your bed: Floor. We’re currently sleeping on a mattress.
Who do you really hate: Joanna Daly. She’s an Irish cunt who deserves to be flayed. (For Legal purposes, I’m going to pretend that I’m joking here)
What time is it now? 11:01 PM

SECOND SECTION
Random:
Is there a person who is on your mind now: Yes.
Do you have any siblings: 3
Do you want children: Yes. One day. In a few years.
Do you smile often: I have no idea. Not consciously.
Do you like your hand-writing: On occasion. I have pretty writing most of the time.
Are your toe nails painted: Ha. Well, there’s the tiniest dot of colour on the very tips, which is from them being painted about 5 months ago. Go me!
Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: I don’t have a bed! I have a mattress on the floor!!
What color shirt are you wearing now: Blue
What were you doing at 7:00 p.m. yesterday: Very little, I’d wager.
I can’t wait till: I’m rich.
Are you a friendly person: No. Go away!
Do you have any pets: Two lovely cats. But I prefer Muse to Gypsy. Mostly because Gypsy is a soulless ghoul.
Where is the person you have feelings for right now?: I couldn’t rightly say as he’s not with me right now.
Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now?: Since that was probably my husband, I’d assume so.
Do you sleep with the TV on?: No
What are you doing right now?: Getting tired of questions.
Have you ever crawled through a window?: I’m sure I have, though I can’t think of any specific instances at the moment.
Can you handle the truth?: Who can?!
Are you too forgiving?: Possibly.
Are you closer to your mother or father?: I trust both of them with different emotions.
Who was the last person you cried in front of?: Ross.
How many people can you say you’ve really loved?: Besides family? Two.
Do you eat healthy?: I have no choice in the matter!
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex?: Yep
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you?: Yep.
If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to?: My mommy and daddy.
Are you loud or quiet most of the time?: Quiet. Unless I’m being intentionally obnoxious.
Are you confident?: I wish I was!

THIRD SECTION
5 things I was doing 10 years ago:

1. Getting ready for my junior year of high school
2. Staying up late on the internet talking to strangers
3. Hanging out at Stateline Speedway with my friend Lisa
4. Enjoying the sensation of being a teen driver
5. Planning my escape from Irvine, PA

5 things on my to-do list today:

1. Give Ross a backrub
2. Write a book
3. Redesign my art site
4. Read magazines
5. Paint pretty things

5 snacks I enjoy:

1. Solero ice cream bars
2. Chicken bites
3. Yogurt
4. Prunes
5. Cheese sticks

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:

1. Pay off the debt of everyone I care about
2. Design and build my dream house complete with art studio
3. Set up a trust fund for future children
4. Donate money to my favourite charities
5. Open an art gallery

5 of my bad habits:

1. Picking scabs
2. Being too critical
3. Shopping too foolishly
4. Being incredibly messy
5. Not keeping promises

5 places I have lived in:

1. Warren, PA, USA
2. Laredo, TX, USA
3. Phoenix, AZ, USA
4. Charlotte, NC, USA
5. Imperial, CA, USA

5 jobs I’ve had:

1. Flight Attendant
2. Engineering Assistant
3. Waitress
4. Recruitment Consultant
5. Marketing Coordinator

Time now: 11:17 PM

I start my new job tomorrow! And while I’m sort of scared and worried that I’ll not impress them, I am really looking forward to this new stage of my life.

Yesterday, I went to Bracknell to go shopping for any supplies I might need (by that I mean beauty supplies with an occasional focus on stationary). I wanted to fix my hair. I’ve dyed it so many times that it doesn’t hold colour very well at all. And though I’ve recently had it cut nearly chin length, and all the dead fluff is gone, it’s still not in the best of shape. But I wanted it back to my natural mahogany colour, so I bought some more dye.

BIG. MISTAKE.

As it turns out, the shade I got was just TOO dark. I look like a goth! As I never see any sun, my skin is pretty pale and fish-like, and this hair makes me look like Elvira’s fat sister. Grr.

So today when Ross gets home (he’s on the south coast visiting his parents for a couple of days), we’ll go out and buy some MORE dye. This time, I think I’ll just get a highlight kit, as I think the only way to get rid of this darkness would be to bleach the whole head, and that’s not something I want to do. Some highlights should sort it out nicely (I HOPE!).

Anyway, this past weekend, I talked to Ross and was able to get him to front me some cash for a new computer. My old one was making grinding noises and sounded like a machine gun. And I was having trouble uploading pictures from my cameras since there was no SD drive, and the USB ports wore out my (very expensive!) batteries.

So now I’ve got an HP Pavilion with SD drive, Pocket Media Drive, loads of other ports, 160G hard drive and over 2 Gigs of memory. Yummy!

I’ve also recently invested in a couple of new diaries. I’m the worst organised person ever, and my new job is going to mean BIG organisation. So I got a pretty purple diary which will be carried with me everywhere, and a smaller pocket diary which will be used at work. Yay!

I DID manage to buy some new makeup yesterday. I got L’Oreal True Match Super-Blendable Powder in Honey, which I’m HOPING is a good match. I tried it on my hand, and it disappeared… That’s a good sign right? :)  And I bought also a L’Oreal Paris ColorAppeal Trio Pro for Blue Eyes. It’s got three shades of eyeshadow which all work together nicely. You outline your lash line with one shade, wear the second shade as eye shadow, and the third shade is for highlights.  *shrug*   Lastly, I bought a L’Oreal Paris Glam Shine 6H in Everlasting Beige.  By the way, buying L’Oreal was completely unintentional.  There weren’t even any good deals on (for the record, No 7 and Max Factor both had free stuff deals going on… what was I thinking?)!! But the makeup did seem to be just what I was after, so no complaints….

Actually, the hair dye was L’Oreal as well! And I DEFINITELY am complaining about that! Grr. Toooooo dark!

Okay, enough bitching. Ross should be home any moment (I hope!), and I need to decide whether we should go ice skating, to see a movie, or just cuddle together all day.

Decisions decisions…

As I mentioned recently, I had a job interview yesterday for a marketing role that I was really keen to get. As I also mentioned, it is a pretty senior role that I never thought I could get. Well, as it happens, I did really well in the interview, and they’ve asked me to come back in on Monday and give a presentation!

They want me to basically give a two part presentation involving

1/ a demonstration of how I would quickly and efficiently familiarise myself with their company and products.
2/ a fictional product they want me to develop a marketing initiative for

So I have four days to get something put together. I’m supposed to spend about 20 minutes talking, after which I’ll be given yet another grilling, this time by the Sales Director.  The job in question is to actually be the ENTIRE marketing department for this company! o_O

They’ve gone through two people in two years, and they want someone fresh, enthusiastic and full of ideas. I think I put it across very well that I am the person for the job….

Only now I’m wondering if I really am.  It seems way over my head. I don’t have any marketing qualifications, nor do I really have any concrete marketing experience. I haven’t claimed any experience I haven’t had, but I’ve “marketed” myself a certain way to achieve a good result. But now I’m sitting here doubting my own abilities and thinking of various reasons not to do the interview!

I’ve given presentations before. In fact, as an ex-flight attendant, I can boast experience of public demonstrations to up to 50 people at once! So presenting to two people should be no issue. Especially as this will be a big part of the job if I get it!

I went out today and bought a book titled “How To Market Your Business - A practical guide to advertising, PR, selling and diret and online marketing.”  I’m hoping it’ll help me come up with some great ideas.

I wish I knew why I so often talk myself out of the positive things in my life. I guess I feel like if I don’t try, then I can’t fail. What I need to get through my head is that not trying IS failing.

Bah.

I suppose my attitude isnt helped by the fact that I’m ill. I got a headache before bed last night, and I woke up with a terrible migraine this morning. I wound up in bed until 2 PM! I spent all day in excruciating pain, nauseous and feeling like I’d been hit by a truck.  A bath, some lemsip and a lot of quiet seems to have helped, but I’m still not feeling great.

Anyway, in other news, yesterday I attended the Endocrinology Clinic at the Royal Berks. I’ve been waiting for an appointment since I got back from Brno.  Basically while I was in hospital, they found out I had low cortisol levels, and as that can be life threatening, I was made an emergency priority when I got back.  (Of course, the fact that I STILL had to wait an extra 5.5 weeks despite my emergency status just shows how difficult the NHS can really be.)

The short story is that I am going back on Tuesday morning for the test that will determine whether I definitely have Addison’s Disease or not. They will draw blood, inject me with some horomone, and then draw blood again at half hourly intervals. If I have the disease, I’ll be on hydrocortisone for the rest of my life. BOO! If I don’t have it, they will slowly wean me off of the 25 mg per day I’ve been taking.

In other other news, Ross and I had a fight tonight. He left the house a couple hours ago, and I’ve no idea where he’s gone. I’m not sure I really care right now.

Not much updating being done lately. I’ve been busy with other projects. Most notably, looking for a new job. I realise that twice in the last month I’ve said I found one… but neither of them were any good for me, and I’ve found that I am simply settling for jobs that mean nothing to me.  Now that having a baby has been put off for at least two years due to my recent stomach surgery, I am wanting to put myself into a job I can love and grow with.

Because of this, I’ve decided (with support from Ross) to go after a job I’ll really love. I’ve settled on pursuing a career in Marketing, as it combines a knack for writing with a knack for art and thinking outside the square. I think I would be really good at it, and I’m very keen to find a perfect role.

So far, though, luck hasn’t been with me. I’m visiting a recruiter today to sign up for temporary work while I wait for a permanent role to come through. And tomorrow morning I have an interview for a Marketing Coordinator role. I think I’m too junior for it, but they’ve seen my CV, so they must know that I have limited experience. It’s well paying, so I am keeping my fingers crossed that I get it. Or at least that it helps me to grow in my interview skills.

The other thing I’ve been working on is a new website. I wanted a place to track my progress on my arts and crafts, so I have started kraftygurl.org. It’s pretty bare at the moment, but in time I hope it’ll be a haven for my artistic endeavors. Especially as I’m hoping to branch out from paintings to full crafts. I have so many ideas, and I’ve been taking pictures of some of my work for a while now.

In other news, I have been falling behind on my 101 in 1001 list. I’m not reading books as fast as I ought to (I have 26 of 50 completed right now), and I don’t visit the cinema enough. That said, Ross and I went to watch Hancock last week, and because I complained to the manager about a dickhead with his cellphone out the whole time, we got free tickets for any movie we want to see any time. I’m thinking I’d like to see the new Batman film on opening night. Bwa ha ha. We never got to the cinema at night, as it’s expensive. So it’ll be nice that price isn’t a consideration.

Last night we watched Sophie’s Choice on TCM, and it was so upsetting. Even though I already knew what happened (it’s a classic - doesn’t EVERYONE know?), it still broke my heart. Meryl Streep was amazing as Sophie. Her accent, her beauty, her drama. And Kevin Kline was excellent. In fact, I related to him a LOT. Maybe it’s because I’m a bit crazy, myself. I can kind of see myself as a mix of Sophie and Nathan. Eep.

Anyhoo… not a lot going on this end. Sorry for all the spam posts lately, but a girl’s gotta make a living somehow, and PayPerPost pays pretty well usually. Although none of my last 4 posts have been approved yeet, and it’s been DAYS. So I’m not sure what’s going on. I may have to complain.

Rather strangely, my tastebuds have changed a lot over the years. When I was a little kid, my mom practically force-fed us peanut butter. We had peanut butter toast for breakfast, peanut butter and jelly for lunch, and often she’d make “peanut butter candy” (a mixture of peanut butter, maple syrup and sugar) for a snack.

It got to a point in my teens where I couldn’t stand the stuff. In fact, even smelling it made me vomit.

But nowadays, I’ve found that I’m actually quite in love with Tesco Crunchy Peanut Butter. I think it’s because in the UK, PB isn’t nearly so sweet as in the states. It tastes more like… I dunno… mashed peanuts. :)

Or maybe my taste buds are finally sophistocated to some extent….

Then again… Maybe not.